Daddy's Girl Problems…

This past weekend, while sitting at the laundromat, I was thinking about families. This was after a call from my BM (baby momma) with some news about my youngest daughter(age 5). Apparently, she has been acting up in school. She went on to say that the disciplinary efforts (butt whippings) she was giving weren’t working and recommended that I have a talk with her the following weekend when I had them. So, naturally I couldn’t wait until then and caught up with them at “Granny’s” house. Prior to meeting them, I had a conversation with her teacher. I was told pretty much what I expected to hear, that her work is outstanding but her behavior won’t be tolerated. I thought back to my childhood and realized that I did the same thing after my parents split and I was about the same age. Every week, when I see my children, they are so happy to see me. We have so much fun and the weekend goes by so fast. We get sad after church, because we know it is approaching time to part ways. When it’s time for the drop off, it never fails, they hate to leave, especially the youngest. I was taking my clothes out of the dryer and thinking, are her behavior problems due to the lack of Daddy time? Last year, when this same situation occurred, she acted out, I was notified, I showed up, and it all stopped. This year, she isn’t with Granny anymore, she is with Mommy and at a new school. It could be the dramatic change of environment, lack of time with me, or both. Needless to say, on the weekend, we had a long talk over a bowl of Blue Bell Cookies & Cream and she opened up. Her argument was right to the point. “Daddy, why can’t we live at your house?” I asked her , “who is we, you your sister and brother?” She quickly added, “and momma”. I was like, uh, um, hmm, literally scratching my head. After another spoon of ice cream and a bit more thought, it hit me. She didn’t understand the split between her parents. It happened fast, with alot of commotion, and then all of sudden she was living with Granny for a couple of years. That was ok for her because that was “get spoiled central”. But now, she’s with mommy and there is no daddy and vise versa. I tried my best to leave out the logistics of the separation and answered her question. I assured her that I loved her followed with some kisses and a tight squeeze. I invited her brother and sister in to join and we had a group hug. I could tell they felt the same way but chose not to act out. They all had a look of relief on their face like, ok the world isn’t coming to an end. I told my youngest I didn’t appreciate her behavior in school and that it wasn’t Christlike. She promised she would do better. I gave them all my business cards and told them to memorize the phone number and call me anytime. They still didn’t want to leave at the drop off, but it wasn’t as bad as it normally is. I think we’re making progress….ya dig…Peace & Blessings!

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